The Mother of All Storms
by Lady Euthan
Summary: Madness has decided once and for all to crush the Teen Titans. Enlisted in this horrible plot are the twins Slash and Femslash. Will the Titans survive the epic battle between their heterosexuality and their strange new desires?
1. Obligatory Prologue

Well, it's finally happened. After years of resisting and disparaging remarks, I have finally caved and written my own fanfiction. T-T

I admit, I am rather discouraged by the lack of good Teen Titans fanfiction that don't involved pedophilia or appallingly ooc characters. So, please, inform me promptly if any of the Titans seem to be acting extremely out of character (you know, besides the whole "gay" thing). And now, without further a due.

The Obligatory Prologue:

The mother of all storms raged through Jump City. Lightning crashed and whipped through the sky, claws of energy tearing at the clouds. The heavens roared in response, thundering with such ferocity that the mountains themselves began to quake in terror, trees shirked and coward like beaten curs. Rain fell, like the blood of the great beasts that battle above, pouring in torrents so violent the streets soon filled with water, a virtual rapid worthy of the most ferocious wilderness settled into the shivering huddle called Jump City.

Warm and snug in an elegant penthouse suite—nestled far above the city, like a roc's nest, vast and forbidding—was an equally elegant young man and a painfully beautiful woman. The two, twins almost, conversed in low tones before a roaring, crackling fire. Their shadows danced lazily on the large wall behind them. The woman chuckled, a rich, chocolaty sound and slapped the man playfully on the arm. He winked back at her, leaning back into a large, gothic, wing-backed chair with a contented smile. He looked away from the woman, smile drooping slightly as he started pensively into the flames. The woman tilted her head to look at him better, her soft features concerned. She gave soft "hm" of sympathy. The man turned back to her and smiled again. With a dark chuckle he gazed out into the blacked sky. The woman followed his gaze. They both looked out into the storm that seemed to be swallowing the elevated penthouse, both with worry creasing their lovely brows, when a the doors of the "humble" abode opened with such violence, both man and woman jumped and turned to stare at the intruder, relaxing only when they recognized their old companion and good friend.

"Slash! Femslash! Get your asses over here this minute and help me get this blasted door shut!" Shouted the rain soaked figure. The woman shrugged carelessly and waved a dismissing hand, smirking to her companion. Slash gave a heavy sigh and rose slowly. A particularly strong draft of air threatened the merry fire, causing the man to move a bit faster.

Unlike a normal penthouse, with clever elevators, this particular penthouse opened directly to the sky and ground below. There was virtually no way into the home without some ability of flight or levitation. This was really quite an illogical setup as neither Flash nor Femslash had the ability of prolonged flight. They could float from place to place, but flying much above head-height was quite strenuous.

The struggle with the door was strenuous, though there were no casualties to either side. Eventually, the door surrendered with a loud groan and SLAM-CLICK as the door was sucked shut by wind and locked. The only evidence of a storm outside came as a loud thumping every now and then, as if the wind were asking nicely if he could come in and have tea and he was very sorry for troubling them so.

Slash huffed a bit after the brief tussle with the door and cocked an inquisitive eye-brown at his friend.

"So, any reason you too so long, Madness?" He purred silkily. The named Madness turned an enraged glare upon the Slash and stalked over to the previously occupied gothic chair and sat heavily, barely bothering to remove the soaking coat. Slash made a disapproving sound, but followed and sat on the floor next the fireplace, the plush carpet as comfortable as any luxury chair.

"I have located our next target." Madness began abruptly. Femslash sat up a little straighter, attentive and eager. There was a short silence, for dramatic effect perhaps, when Slash snorted softly.

"Well, alright then, who is it?" He growled out, clearly irritated. (Though the floor was really quite comfortable, it was a still a step down from a chair, and any demotion was a disgrace.) Madness studied its nails for a moment, then looked up, first at Slash then to his sister.

"A little group called the Teen Titans." Madness said, almost nonchalantly, its voice a little too eager.

"Oh." Femslash pouted, he lower lip protruding slightly, doing her best to look cute and sexy.

"We're going after minors now?" Slash cut in, mildly incredulous. Madness sighed, long and hard, as if the adults that sat with it were difficult and quite dim children.

"I have noticed than none of the Teenie Titans are in anyway homo- or bisexual. This horrifies me." Madness spoke smoothly. "As such, slash and femslash is horribly lacking for the Titans fan-base." Madness turned it's empty, fathomless, soulless eyes on the two siblings. "You are to find the Titans, infiltrate their establishment—_unnoticed, _Fem—and cause complete, beautiful chaos. After all, noting is worse than hormonal, sexually confused teenagers." With that, it fell silent, quietly contemplating the fire.

Femslash pursed her lips and stood stiffly. She began to walk toward the door, pausing briefly to gesture towards her brother, who slowly got to his feet.

"Why do we like that thing again?"


	2. Obligatory Plotting

"Okay," Slash said, taking a sip of his tea—no sugar, straight up green tea. "We need a game plan." Fem nodded absently. Her iced mocha seemed a strange choice of drink to have after the bone-soaking storm. She opened another sugar packet and dumped it into her drink, stirring slowly. Slash grimaced as his sister sipped from the syrupy cold. "We need to know as much about the Titans as possible. What do we know? Briefly, please." Fem cleared her throat and then began.

"Depending on what gossip group you're in with, the Titans came about in one of two ways. First—a young Titan named Raven located the original team member and created the Titans that way; the second—that the young Robin created the Titans. He, evidently, grew tired of his mentor's shadow and left to make a name for himself. He then came across the ones called Cyborg, Beast Boy and Raven. They joined forces to capture and then rescue the alien they call Starfire. Thus, the Titans were born. From then on, they have been collecting supers like rabbits make babies."

"So, what are our best options?" Slash asked, head supported on steepled fingers, eyes closed dramatically. Fem contemplated the question with a sip of mocha.

"We can tackle this with the classics easily. Love-hate: opposites attract. Love-love: made for each other. Hate-hate: aggression expressed sexually, relationship develops later."

"Alright. So, let's start with double love, who've we got that fits that quota?" By now, Slashes eyes were glittering with the thrill of the hunt.

"I thought you'd choose that, romantic sap, so I've broken down into sub-groups." Fem grinned wickedly, Slash lightly slapped her shoulder in mock annoyance. Se giggled into her straw, taking another sweet gulp before continuing. "Similarities through lifestyle, past or powers. Oh, and friends turned lovers." Slash raised an eyebrow, silently instructing his sister to continue. "Through lifestyle: both Aqualad and Beast Boy avoid meat, though while Beast Boy is a vegan, Aqualad avoids mostly fish and aquatic animals."

"Sound promising." Slash interjected slyly, grinning.

"Hush. Past, well almost every Titan has a miserable past, most parentless. For this, both Starfire and Raven are from different worlds—almost an opposites attract pairing, I know, but still." Slash made a face. Girls were not his forte. "Once again, Beast Boy and Aqualad share a tortured past here, though Speedy and Aqualad were abandoned in some hour of need by relatives or close friends." Fem rolled her eyes, Slash shrugged.

"It takes a tragedy to make a hero." He said calmly. Fem huffed and continued.

"For powers, we have Speedy and Robin, both highly trained but having no inherent powers and both were masks. Aqualad and Beast Boy both have abilities relating to animals and both have different from normal appearances. Both Bumblebee and Starfire can fly and shot energy from their hands. Mas y Menos and Kid Flash have the abilities of super-speed. But you know how I feel about incest and pedophilia." Fem glared at her brother pointedly, causing him to tsk and pout regally. "That's about it for that group. For, for friends. Beast Boy and Cybrog are quite close as friends, as are Beast Boy and Robin, though not as strongly. Starfire and Raven could possibly be friends, though not nearly to the level needed for a pairing of this kind to work." Fem took another sip of mocha, finishing her drink. She excused herself and got up to throw her empty cup away—remember kids, don't litter!—leaving her brother to ponder. When she returned, he looked very satisfied with himself, content as a cat.

"Now, about love-hate?" Fem took a sip from another drink—iced latte—and winced at its "bitterness." She tore open a packet of sugar and began.

"Love-hate: This could play under Raven and Starfire: Starfire is very chipper and happy while Raven is notorious for being dower and apathetic." Slash made a dismissing notion, urging his sister to continue. She glared at him lightly. "Robin and Speedy could be seen as competitors, as they share the same powers. Like wise for Auqalad and Beast Boy, as they got off to a rocky start. Speedy and Aqualad for sure—fish tacos." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "I don't believe there would be anyone else." Slash nodded thoughtfully.

"Hate-hate?" He asked hopefully. Nothing a hardcore slash fan loved more than agressive porn with minimal plot.

"Hate-hate: Possibly Speedy and Aqualad: once again, fish tacos. Hm. Possible Aqualad and Beast Boy, though I think they resolved their issues—holy gape orn, Slash!" Fem gasped in horror. "I forgot! Predator-prey! Dear me." Slash laughed at his sister's dramatics, though he_ was_ slightly disturbed that she could have forgotten anything so juicy.

"I forgive you, now…?"

"Well, the only ones who might be even slightly predatory would be…well, perhaps Speedy. He _was_ a heroin addict. Aqualad was a prince, though he was exiled. Beast Boy does have a 'furry little problem.' You could use that as a kind of 'you won't like me when I'm not sexually appeased.'" Slash snorted into his tea to keep from laughing to loudly in the quiet café. People were already curious. Fem cast him a despairing glance before summing up her "brief" presentation. "That means our strongest options are Aqualad /Speedy, Aqualad / Beast Boy, Raven/Starfire. In close second are Robin/Speedy and Robin/Beast Boy." Fem huffed slightly. She didn't have the options she wanted, just two people to play with, while her brother could wreak havoc as extensively as he pleased. Slash nodded, grinning widely, yet darkly.

"This," he stated, voice wrought with dark intentions and hopeless finality, "will be fun!"

* * *

I apologize! This chapter had no Teen Titans! I am a disgrace!


	3. Obligatory Plot Decive ACTIVATED

The Titan Tower was unusually quiet this morning. Outside the tower raged a new storm of equal, if not more ferocious, strength as its predecessor. Every Titan was snuggled happily in their beds, dreaming dreams of craftily woven reality and fiction. None were aware of the intangible enemy that compromised their tower. None were aware of the suffering they would undergo. Each dreamed peacefully.

Oh wait, never mind. A sleepy Aqualad sat under a continual spray of water in the gym showers of Titan Towers. The Titans East had not planned to be staying the night in the western tower. Had they been thinking, they would have considered leaving the atlantian behind. They were still unsure as to how long Aqualad could remain without water before suffering for it, and none were to keen to find out. As such, they'd set him up with a water-proof bed and a continual spray of water.

Unfortunately, heat was automatically set to shut off at two in the morning. Aqualad had been woken from his dreams shivering and miserable, the water ice cold. After a few minutes of fiddling with the hot water tabs, the boy gave up. He was fully aware that being exposed to cold water for a prolonged period of time could kill even a fish (water had a nifty ability to maintain a relatively hospitable temperature from winter to summer), and he had no idea how long he had been under the freezing spray. He had to warm up fast or fear hypothermia.

It was with this thought in mind that a soaking Aqualad found himself wandering the halls of Titans Tower, shivering. The gym—the one with the showers—was located in the tower's lower level. As, such, the first thing Aqualad came across was a sauna (lovingly adored by any Titan that had suffered a training session with Robin the Boy Slave-Driver.). He was relieved until he found that, of course, the power had been cut of from the box of warmth. He groaned, teeth chattering loudly. He kept walking slowly along the tower's labyrinth of halls. It was a mercy, then, than he finally came across Beast Boy's sleeping quarters. He tried to knock politely, but all that he accomplished was a pathetic "tack-tack" before he gave up and opened the door.

The door opened with a quiet hiss, creating a portal from the clean and neat hallway to the messy, hap-hazard lair of the boy-beast. Aqualad shudder, or maybe shivered, before stepping carefully into the room.

"Beast Boy?" He called hoarsely. "B-b-beast B-boy?" He approached the lumpy figure on the small, rectangular bed. He poked the lump experimentally and got a no response. Repeat. A groan. Progress was progress, but Aqualad was frozen and starting to go numb. He poked harder, twice and got a sleepy:

"Wha'sit Robin?" A half-sleeping Beast Boy almost looked at Aqualad, eyes unfocused. Aqualad shivered again, a violent seizure-shiver. He took a deep, chattery breathe.

"C-c-can I s-s-sleep with y-y-y-y-you?" He managed, holding his breath. He wasn't about to take no for an answer. Beast Boy mumbled something and nodded, turning over, away from Aqualad. Standing their awkwardly, Aqualad slid closer to the bed and sat down on the edge. When Beast Boy didn't respond to the shift in weight, the atlantian was forced to slide under the covers, very, very close to the green boy. Beast Boy shivered and mumbled something, shifting from his hominid shape to the warmer form of a dog and snuggled close to Aqualad. Hugging the furry beast, Aqualad sighed and closed his eyes, trying to ignore the dog-scent and a nagging feeling that told him something was wrong.

Robin was up at six o'clock sharp that morning, as he was every morning. He started out stretching and sparring with himself, then after two hours of training and one hour of scanning criminal activity (there was none, of course, the storm had chased every person—sane or insane—into hiding), Robin began to go about and wake his team. Cyborg was the first to be woken, as he would cook breakfast for the team most mornings—a very good deal, Robin though bitterly, as he finished informing the girls that breakfast was being made and prepared himself for the battle of "waking the beast."

Poorly prepared Robin was when he found Beast Boy in beg, snuggled up with Aqualad. Who was snuggling him back. Years of training fled the boy wonder at that moment as he yelped—well, screamed— quite loudly.

Aqualad woke with a start, body attempting to shoot up and out. Entrapped, he fell with a thump back against the pillow upon which his head had rested, and found himself staring into wide, sleepy green eyes.

Robins scream was joined by two more of varying horror.

Mas y Menos were the first to arrive at the confusing scene, finding Aqualad and Beast Boy tangled in bed sheets, struggling valiantly to escape. This was also how Bumblebee and Speedy found the two boys, both blushing profusely, an awkward silence followed their freedom from the cursed sheets, before the shouting match started.

"What the hell were you doing in my bed?" Beast Boy screamed, loud as he could, face turning a dark green.

"I was cold! I ask you last night and you said I could sleep with you—"

"I-do not-remember that!" The green one shouted.

"Well, you did! I was cold—"

"That what you call it? You molested me! Robin!" Beast Boy spun toward the wonder and pointed accusingly at Aqualad. "He tried to molest me! You saw! You saw it!"

"Ah—" Robin was cut of by a suddenly very angry Aqualand.

"You said it was okay! What, are you mad it was me not Robin?"

"What the—_hell_ NO! Why the hell would you think that?" Beast Boy paled dramatically while Aqualad grew two shades redder.

"You thought I was freaking boy wonder!"

"That has nothing to do with you molesting me—"

"ENOGUH!" Bumblebee roared, buzzing angrily. "We will settle this NOW. Fish-boy, your story." She glared at Aqualad darkly.

"I-I was—the heat went off last night and I was frozen. I didn't want to get hypothermia—"

"A likely story—" Beast Boy interrupted, eyes flaring with rage.

"—so I tried to warm up, but I got so cold I just came to first warm place I found. I _asked_ Beast Boy if I could share his bed—he has nice thick covers—and he nodded! There was nothing more to it." Aqualad finished, flushing from anger and embarrassment.

"Alright. Beast Boy, your story." Bumblebee nodded to the green boy.

"Well, I was sleeping, all nice and warm when suddenly Robin was screaming! I opened my eyes so I could rush to help him and found BIG MANLY FISH-CHEST IN MY FACE! So I shouted to alert the others I was in distress and then you guys arrived."

Had Aqualad not been conditioned by now to never talk when Bumblebee was thinking, he would have thanked Beast Boy for calling him manly and then begun to insult the green boy in every way possible until his gills turned blue. Instead, he looked desperately over to his team-mates. The twins, Mas y Menos, seemed to be sharing a joke, whispering in rapid-fire Spanish, while Speedy looked torn between disgust and side-splitting laughter. Bumblebee cleared her through, about to speak, when Aqualad felt it coming.

He sneezed, a loud, breaking-the-sound-barrier kind of sneeze. The kind that made random strangers stare in awe and fear. Bumblebee nodded to herself with a grim look.

"That settles it. Fish-boy has a cold." I sneezed again, then began to cough. Beast Boy looked exasperated. He turned from Robin to Bumblebee in desperation.

"Dude! Still! My room! My BED! That's not cool!"

"Agreed." Robin finally found himself able to speak. His voice was calm and commanding, though a telling smirk flitted across his lips and a slight blush still remained on his face. "Aqualad, stay five feet away from Beast Boy until further notice, understand?" Aqualad protested, but was cut off by a loud sneeze and another coughing fit. He sniffed loudly. "Anyway, you should get to the sick-bay. See what Raven has to say about your cold." With that, Robin turned and retreated to the familiar chaos of morning meals with his team-mates while Bumblebee followed him, nudging him and laughing. He chuckled weakly.

"But—" Aqualad blurted, trying to discreetly wipe his nose. The twins had already sped off, presumably to inform the rest of the team of the "scandal" while the gossip was fresh. Speedy came up and grabbed Aqualad's shoulder, steering the sickly boy out of the still disgruntled Beast Boy's room.

It was few moments before either said anything, Speedy grinning merrily while Aqualad looked simply dejected.

"So…" Speedy drawled once he was sure they were out of hearing range. "Beast Boy, huh?" The atlantian gave him a look of loathing, ruined by his miserable sniffling. "I mean I knew you slept with the fish, but _this_? I'm surprised!" The archer looked down on Aqualad with a superior smirk and something of curiosity. After a few seconds of silence, the latter straightened with speed enough to shame the Flash.

"Why? WHY do you hate me so much? You can't just leave me alone! I was COLD! I was ready to curl up with Trident, need be!" He huffed, coughed and glared at the laughing Speedy before continuing. "And he was a _dog_. An adorable, fluffy dog."

"Oh, so he's your bitch, now?"

"Who's whose bitch?" Cybrog asked, flipping a beautiful, golden pancake onto a plate and giving it to one of the twins, who then devoured it in under a second, holding the plate out innocently as Cyborg sighed and poured more batter into the pan.

"Aqualad y Beast Boy." The Mas replied absently, eyeing his brother's plate, waiting to snatch the next pancake. Cyborg sputtered and laughed.

"Forgive me, but, what is a 'bitch?'" Starfire asked, smothering her pancake with mustard and barbeque sauce. The room fell quiet for a moment before the boys began to snicker, cracking jokes and laughing. Raven rolled her eyes, turned to Starfire and said loudly enough to be heard of the cacophony of snorts and giggles.

"A bitch was traditionally used as a proper term for a female dog, especially one that was 'intact,' however, recent generations have adopted the word _bitch_ to mean a promiscuous girl or the submissive person in a sexual relationship." The laughter sputtered and died as Raven gave her short, monotone explanation.

"Geez, you just killed the humor of the moment, Raven." Speedy complained loudly. Starfire remained puzzled and inquired further.

"I had thought that inter-species relationships were, um, tattoo?" Starfire ventured timidly, scratching her head.

"Inter-species relationships _are_ taboo, Starfire, though, given that aliens and other non-humans are becoming for frequently encountered on Earth, the rules may change." Raven looked over at Aqualad and Speedy and cocked a dark eyebrow knowingly. "Though, how did we get onto this topic?" Aqualad blushed slightly as Speedy opened his mouth to spew the story anew.

"Well, ol' Water-boy was caught snuggling his honey Beast Boy. But the beasty didn't like being molested in the night." He nudged the atlantian in the ribs playfully, seconds before Aqualad turned on him and snarled:

"What's the big deal! People sleep with each other all the time—"

"They normally ain't sleeping."

"Get off my case you fish-eating jerk!" With that, Aqualad stormed out of the room, unfortunately right into still unhappy Beast Boy.

"Hey, watch it you perv!" The green boy yelped as Aqualad brushed past him. No-one quite saw the intense looked Aqualad gave the boy, though if they had, they would have understood why Beast Boy paled so suddenly and twittered nervously into the room. There was an awkward silence in the room, each person either to embarrassed or confused to say anything.

"¿Él es ...?" Mas ventured quietly to his brother.

"Definitivamente." Menos replied firmly.

"You should go apologize." Bumblebee informed Speedy bluntly, a cold, irritated look firmly on her face. He glared at her in return.

"Hell no! Do you think he wants his pancakes?"

His question was met with stony silence.


	4. Obligatory Bonding Process

"Insensitive pricks can't leave me alone." Aqualad sneezed loudly, alerting Speedy to his presence. The speedster quickly quit his muttering and slowly slunk around the doorway to the gym showers where Aqualad sulked under a lukewarm spray of water. He hesitated a moment before deciding to venture into the makeshift atlantian lair. With an extra portion of pancakes to full his courage (he _did_ get the pancakes after all) he cleared his throat loudly. Aqualad looked up suddenly, for a second hopeful, before the light was visibly crushed from his eyes, leaving him even sulkier than before.

"If you're just gonna tease me, then get out." He said, coldly as possible. Speedy, shifted nervously from one foot to the other, looking at the ceiling, then the floor.

"The others are under the impression that I owe you an apology." Speedy began slowly. Aqualad looked up at him suspiciously but expectantly. "I, of course, told them where to shove their apology."

"Leave me alone." Aqualad leaned his head against his knees, hugging himself rather pathetically. Speedy snorted.

"Seriously, man, what on Earth possessed you to just go ahead and hop into someone's bed just like that?" Aqualad grumbled something under his breath. Speedy rolled his eyes and nudged the moping boy with a booted foot, retreated when said foot got sprayed by the shower water. "What was that?"

"My old foster-father and I used to share a bed. We…we didn't really have a lot of space to spread out without the other atlantians getting suspicious." Aqualad faltered faintly, breaking into a fit of coughing.

"What do you mean 'other atlantians?'" Speedy asked, eyes narrowing.

"Well, you know I was, ah, exiled, right?" Speedy nodded. New Titans were always briefed before meeting other team-mates, to avoid catastrophes and offense. Ie: fish tacos. "Well, my original sentence was death." He said, coolly and without emotion, though Speedy really couldn't be sure, as the boy's face was hidden. "I was raised by a hermit and we couldn't risk being found until the others had cooled down a bit."

"Any particular reason you were sentenced to death?" Speedy inquired as nonchalantly as he could, trying very hard to read his team-mates simply by the slump of his shoulders and the way his long dark hair hugged his hidden face. Aqualad chuckled softly, looking up at Speedy and pointing to his eyes.

"My father save Atlantis by trapping a dangerous man in an alternate dimension. In the process he cursed his offspring. Any child born with purple eyes has the potential to release the criminal, should they decide to reach their full potential." He sneezed again, and sniffed miserably. Speedy looked nervously around the room again, before sighing.

"Hey man, you're really sick. Why not come up to my room so we can find you some warm clothes?" He ventured (there were a few spare rooms in the Titan's Tower for overnight visit, though not enough, evidently). Aqualad looked up at him doubtfully.

"You're not going to claim I'm molesting you?" He asked coldly. Speedy laughed and started walking towards the door.

"You won't know until you try! Beside, _I_ have a bathtub!"

"Ah…" Aqualad moaned softly.

"Feels good?"

"Yess…Ah! Right there!"

"You okay with your clothes on?"

"Now who's the pervert?" Speedy blushed slightly. Aqualad was content in his tub, disappearing under the water then above it. He blinked water out of his eyes as they adjusted to the dry air. "You, ah, aren't going to tell anyone about what I told you in the shower, right?" He asked uncertainly. Speedy blinked in surprise as he brought in clothes for his team-mate and laid them on the floor, a safe distance from the tub. He chuckled.

"We all have out stories, Fish-boy. Most are tragedies." He said softly, surprisingly serious. Aqualad nodded and then ventured hesitantly:

"What's your story?" Speedy grinned sadly.

"Well, like most people, my parents died. In a fire. I was raised by an old man who taught me how to shoot the bow and arrow." Speedy touched his bow fondly, his grin dropping. "My mentor, the Green Arrow, took me in when he saw how good I was and then I became Speedy." He hesitated, looking at Aqualad for a moment, then he continued, his voice colder, almost bitter. "I got into some bad stuff and he kicked me out of his house." Aqualad nodded slowly, sympathetically.

"What, ah, kind of stuff?" He asked slowly. Speedy's head snapped up to him, his eyes cold and eerily empty.

"Bad stuff."

"Ah." Aqualad stared into the water for a bit, then, in an attempt at levity, said: "Why didn't I get such a nice bed last night if they were all so worried about me and my hydrophilia?" He asked, making a small orb of water appear between his hands. Speedy was a bout to answer when, to his horror, Aqualad sneezed, right into the ball of water, and right into Speedy's face.

"Ah! Gah! Oh my God!" Speedy clutched at his face, a if he had just been splashed with acid, not potentially contaminated water.

"Ah! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Aqualad stood up in the tub, splashing water everywhere. Speedy had now doubled over on the floor, rolling around and clutching his face. Aqualad jumped from foot to foot, looking for a towel. He reached out for one, a nice fluffy one with little ducks at the edges, and slipped, falling out of the tub and onto the fetally positioned Speedy.

"Gack!" Speedy gasped as the wind was knocked out of him and Aqualad landed with a loud "oompf."

"Get off, get off, get off!" Speedy began smacking at the atlantian, mostly on the face and head, though some blows strayed from their mark. After a few minutes' scuffling, the situation was sorted. Speedy sulked on his bed as Aqualad changed into his spare clothes, locked safely in the bathroom. "You clean up in there, too!"

"Yeah, yeah." Came the response, muffled by a layer of door. Speedy muttered darkly under his breath, changing from his suite to street clothes quickly, lest the newly dubbed pervert emerge from his bathroom imprisonment. He had just pulled his shirt over his head as Aqualad stepped out of the bathroom wearing a t-shirt proclaiming "Born for Speed!" and tight, one-size-to-small jeans. He looked intensely uncomfortable.

"You wear this stuff all the time?" He asked skeptically. "It seemed far to heavy to be practical." Speedy sighed dramatically.

"The moment this storm is over, Fish-sticks, I'm taking you out for some serious how-to-be-human training. Now come on, the team probably thinks you've molested me in the showers."

"Oh, honestly, Slash?" Fem gave her brother a despairing glance. He shrugged and indicated the two boys, Aqualad storming off in a huff as Speedy laughed and chased after him. "You used the 'I'm-crawling-into-bed-with-you-because-I'm-cold' excuse?" His shrug became a little weaker. "That only works for cheesy, poorly written smut novels and Brokeback Mountain." She declared vehemently. He matched her, look for look, glare for glare.

"I don't see you making the girls fall out for each other." Fem looked horrified by the suggestion.

"You cad! Women take time to acknowledge their feelings! You don't just wake up one day and want to molest your best friend! No! Girls are different from boys, you testosterone-pumped male!" She crossed her arms sternly while Slash just shrugged.

"I guess that's why I'm more popular than you are." He said with a falsely sympathetic smile. "I've got the two F's after all." Fem looked at his with disgust.

"Those would be?"

"Why, fretting and fuc—"

"Shh! something's happening!"

After one of Robin's infamous training sessions, no one had energy enough to comment on the morning's fiasco, or why Aqualad was wearing Speedy's clothes. They did, however, seem to have energy enough to gather around the kitchen table and argue over who would produce the noon meal.

"I vote Aqualad." Speedy declared, hand raised in the air.

"I second that." Beast Boy lifted his hand also.

"Uh-uh! No way!" Cyborg shook his head fervently, making slicing motions with both hands. "It was bad enough having tofu pizza yesterday, I'm not having another earth-friendly meal!"

"I vote Cyborg!" Robin said, shrugging when the metal man shot him a glare.

"I cooked yesterday! And this morning!" He stood, attempting to use his height to intimidate the much smaller Robin.

"Friends! Do not fight! I will gladly produce the second daily meal of lunch!" Starfire declared happily as she began to float over to the stove. As such, she missed the looks of complete and utter terror that afflicted her teammates.

"Hey, that's okay Star, I don't mind cooking!" Cyborg moved with incredible speed to intercept the girl as she reach to turn on the stove. She gave him a slightly hurt look.

"You…do not like my cooking, is that it?" She asked, an adorable pout on her face. He winced and looked over to his teammates for help. Though Robin opened his mouth to save Cyborg embarrassment, it was Raven who spoke.

"It's not that Starfire, Cyborg just remembered that he promised to make a very good lunch today, because, uh, Aqualad missed his breakfast today. Right, Cyborg?"

"That's right!" Cyborg nodded vigorously, gently pushing Starfire—and the rest of the Titans—out of the kitchen. Starfire smiled brightly.

"You should have said such then! Come, Raven! Let us go make the meditation!" She grabbed Raven's arm and flew off in the direction of her rooms. Raven floated along miserably, glaring at the snickering Speedy.

"Hey man." Beast Boy ventured as he walked up to Aqualad timidly. Aqualad looked at him, holding his hand out in a halting gesture.

"Five feet, remember?" He said bitterly. Beast Boy, shrugged, looking around for a moment—long enough to notice that most of the Titans had cleared out of the room to do what ever they did on breaks, leaving only him, Aqualad, and a lurking Speedy.

"Oh, whatever, look, I'm sorry man. I didn't mean to flip out on you this morning. It's just…ah—" he glaneced over at Speedy, before looking back at Auqalad. "Hey! You know there's a way to the bay from the tower right?" Aqualad looked surprised then he smiled brightly.

"No, I didn't! Can you show me?"

"Sure." Beast Boy gestured for the atlantian to follow him, looking pointedly at Speedy, who shrugged and walked off. Beast Boy turned back to Aqualad. "It's not much, but it's enough to stretch in."

The walk down to the docking area for the Titan's submarine was tense, filled with falsely light conversation. They detoured to Speedy's room—the boy was oddly absent—so Aqualad could grab his no dry suite and change quickly. He folded the clothes neatly and set them on Speedy's bed before meeting up with Beast Boy again. By the time they had arrived at the docking bay, all forms of light conversation had been used so that the only thing left was awkward quiet.

The first thing one would notice about the docking area is that it had no natural light. The only light comes from large spotlight that hung high on the ceiling. The next thing notice would be that the area was almost entirely a cave, the only thing man-made being the wooden dock that led to the vessel itself. Upon noticing the water, ran to the edge of the rocks and, with a joyous whoop, sprang into the water. Beast Boy laughed and scurried over to the water, shifting easily into a sea otter to join the frolicking Aqualad. After a few minutes of racing about, avoiding rocks, walls and the dominate submarine, Beast Boy scampered out of the water and rested on the shore, panting loudly. Aqualad popped his head out of the water, watching the boy catch his breath.

"So…you never told me why you were o mad at me this morning." He began casually, attempting to make a water-puppet dance. Beast Boy was silent for a moment. He sat up to look at Aqualad with an uncharacteristic skepticism.

"You…you know that my parents are dead." He began bluntly. Aqualad nodded. He hadn't actually known this, but he assumed by now that every Titan was an orphan. "Well, when they died, I got into some bad stuff. I didn't want to, but things happened." His eyes seemed to visibly darken as he stared at the rock walls. Aqualad jumped out of the water and sat by his friend in what he hoped was a comforting manner.

"What kind of stuff?" He asked quietly. Beast Boy remained quiet for a moment, opening his mouth to speak, closing it, then opening it again. Almost like a fish out of water. "You don't have to—"

"I was kidnapped." The boy whispered, harshly. His face suddenly seemed angry, intense and—well—_beastly_. "The people, they made me hurt people. They teased me, harassed me in any way they could. I…I was saved, but—" He looked at Aqualad meaningfully.

"They didn't…they didn't, ah…" Aqualad stammered, face flushing slightly, not wanting to finish the sentence. Beast boy's eyes seemed to grow darker, more hateful, if possible.

"Molest me? No. But they talked about it." He looked back at the cave wall. "I think they just wanted to scare me. But…" The two boys were quiet for a long time. They remained silent until they heard the shouting.

"No! We must not eat until the Aqualad is here to partake also of the spaghetti and meatballs!"

"Staaar! I'm hungry! If fish-boy was hungry he'd have stuck around the kitchen."

"Cyborg…"

"You sure they're down here, Speedy?" Robin asked, voice echoing down the hallway and into the cavern.

"No, Robin, I'm not sure at all. I just like walking into the very bowels of the Earth with a tin-man, alien and a bird-brain." Speedy snapped as the odd search party rounded the corner.

"Well, geez, Speedy, aren't you cranky today." Cyborg interjected grumpily.

"Aqualad!" Starfire squealed happily, flying to his side.

Only Speedy and Robin caught the strange look that passed between the two boys, a kind of sad look, Aqualad's one of concern and Beast Boy's one of pain. Both disappeared quickly as Aqualad had the breath choked out of him and Beast boy quickly shifted his frown into a gleaming smile.

"Hey, water-lad didn't try and molest you again, did he?" Speedy asked jokingly, eyes watching for even the slightest hint of discomfort in Beast Boy's eyes and being rewarded with a light-quick wince and a flick of eye movement toward Aqualad. Speedy kept his grin firmly in place as Beast Boy laughed.

"Nah, we're cool now. Right, Aquadude?" He nudged the suffocating Aqualad in the ribs playfully.

"Yeah," he said with equal cheer, "we're cool."


End file.
